The Plight of the Unemployed

Not working is one hell of a job. Here's how it goes:

8:30am: Girlfriend's alarm clock rings, then another. Then another, then another. We both ignore said alarms and doze for another half-hour.

9:00am: Sensing that she has actual responsibilities to take care of, girlfriend gets out of bed and prepares to commute to her place of gainful employment. I remain unfazed and asleep.

10:30am: Hunger awakes your humble narrator. I stumble into the kitchen, prep a quick breakfast and check email.

10:45am: Breakfast summarily devoured; now browsing job boards on Craigslist and professional sites. Sometimes there is a post, sometimes not. If there is, I wait to become less groggy and then I send off the necessary materials. If there isn't, I whine via Twitter about there not being jobs available.

11:30am: Email is then checked, and messages from companies saying that "they admire my resume and portfolio but can't hire me" are replied to politely through tears. I update my Excel spreadsheet of companies I've contacted.

12:00pm-1:30pm: Lunch, bitches!

1:30pm-4:00pm: Check job boards again in the vain hope that a company has put something up that I can throw a resume at. (I learned a few months ago that companies very rarely do this if they're only looking for one person...in this economy they'll get hundreds of emails/applications regarding the job. They're loathe to post because they don't want to go through tons of applications.)

4:00pm: Surprise! Nobody hiring today.

4:00pm-7:00pm: Video game time. At the very least, I can take my frustration out on aliens or zombies.

(Rinse and Repeat)